When Collin Clabaugh’s mom was admitted to hospital at Christmas 2018 and his dad had to split his time between work and taking care of his sick wife, the teen went to live with his grandparents for some time until his mother felt better and they could live together again as a family in Riverside County, California.
However, things don’t always turn out the way we wish for them to, so Collin’s mother eventually died in January 2019 from organ failure due to medications, and two weeks later, her husband took his own life because he couldn’t stand his life without his dear wife.
All these events left 15-year-old Collin alone, with the only family that can help him being his grandparents from his father’s side, Melodie Passmore and her husband, Randy. So the three of them continued living together in a 55+ community in Arizona. Unfortunately, the House Owners Association (HOA) and some community members were not happy with this turn of events, so Melodie was asked to come up with an alternative living arrangement for her grandson, since he doesn’t meet the age requirement (19 years old).
According to Passmore, when she was asked about the HOA why she didn’t inform them earlier that the young boy was still living with them, she replied that she was busy arranging two funerals and taking care of a house in California. Afterward, the elderly woman allegedly sent a letter to the HOA explaining the situation, but she received no response.
Since then, she has been fighting the absurdity of the system, claiming that it is ridiculous for people to care about one rule instead of one human life. The alternative would be for Collin to be sent to live with a foster family, which neither he or his grandparents are willing to let happen.
“I just don’t think it’s right- what they’re doing,” Collin Clabaugh told ABC15 Arizona. “And I think that they should be a little bit more compassionate.”
Given that the HOA has given the Passmores a deadline to comply with the community’s rules by June 30, the family is now looking at how they can find a solution to the problem that has arisen. Melodie Passmore posted on Facebook a few days ago, clarifying the circumstances under which her grandson went to live with them, explaining that he is not someone that would cause trouble to the community, and asking for empathy and understanding on behalf of the community and the HOA.
In her text, she also states that she and her husband didn’t choose to buy a property in a 55+ community because they didn’t want to be around children, but because this is what they could afford and this was a neighborhood they liked. She carried on saying that there was no way they could foresee that their daughter in law would pass or that their son would commit suicide; so, when their grandson was left alone, they just had to take him in.
“This isn’t a little whiney kid running up and down the street screaming and causing trouble. This is a young man who helps his neighbors and is rarely seen outside of going to and from school,” Passmore wrote in her post.
This is a sad story that shows that sometimes people should act with compassion, empathy, and sensitivity, instead of sticking with rules and bylaws. Whatever the outcome of this debate is, let’s hope for the young boy to find a safe and loving home to live in either way.
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