Couples who massage together, stay together. This appears to be the finding of a new study out of England that followed 19 couples through a three-week massage course. “There’s something inherently sexy about massage between couples,” says Emma Merkas, co-founder of Melt: Massage For Couples.
Why You Should Massage Your Partner
Both partners have much to gain in the way of improving perceived stress, coping ability, and overall well-being from rubbing each other down at the end of a long day. The goal with couples massage is intimacy, says New York-based massage therapist Michael Ciardulli. “You’re taking the time to treat your partner the way he or she deserves to be treated.”
Practicing massage with your partner will keep the romance alive. It is an exercise in trust-building and nurtures an emotional connection between you and your partner.
Set the Mood
When giving your partner a massage, setting the mood is just as important as the techniques you use. The space itself should be clutter free and should not have anything that may distract either of you from the massage. You may choose to enhance the mood with ambient music, incense, or lighting. Make sure to choose a firm surface for your partner to lie on that won’t move under the pressure of the massage.
Techniques to Try on Your Partner
Start with a foot massage. It may not sound romantic, but it will relieve a world of built up tension, not only in the feet but throughout the body due to the pressure points that correlate to other body systems.
Warm up the oil in your hands. Nobody likes cold massage oil dumped directly onto their back. This can be startling and uncomfortable for your partner.
Keep your pressure firm and even with the palms of your hands and remember to massage muscles, not push on bones.
Communicate and don’t rush. “Always ask what feels good for your partner. Good communication is the most important part of the massage,” says Vladanka Manceva, Director of Operations at luxury spa brand, K Spa.
Massage strokes should be in the direction of the heart to promote blood circulation.
Variety is the spice of life. Mix up the type and length of your strokes, but remember to have each stroke flow smoothly into the next.
That being said, technique isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Erika Wright, a massage therapist at Element Bodywork in San Francisco, says, “It’s as easy as you allow it to be. Touch is so delightful, and when done with loving intention, there’s no wrong way. Touch your partner the way you’d like to be touched. Be willing to put all of your focus and feeling into what you are doing. That is so much more powerful than ‘technique’ or ‘skill.’” And remember, massage with your partner is about connection and exploration, and nothing is off limits.
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